Being the Last

Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, “If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all.”  Matthew 9:35 (NIV)

It is not fun being the last.  It is not fun watching all the others selected before us.  How can we feel good about not being preferred?  How can we feel special when we have an attitude of a servant?  Who truly thinks of all others before thinking of ourselves?  Are we living in times when a teaching like this can even reach our ears?  Who is there that takes this kind of teaching seriously?  Is there anyone left who would bend their knee and seek the Lord´s help to effectuate this kind of attitude in all they do?

Jesus´ words are so direct.  His teaching is so clear on this subject.  One would think that each and every Christian would drop everything and work on attaining first and foremost this very nature.  But do we?  Is this what outsiders see in the believing body?  Is this what defines you and me?  Is it clear for everyone to see?  Is it the first and lasting impression that we are humbly placing others before us?  If not, what are we going to do about it?

Should we make this text easier to swallow?  Should we water it down or look to other preferred texts?  Surely there are some great texts we could point to which allow us to keep our dignity.  Surely we can save face, save pride, save self in some way.  Will the Lord forgive us for saving a little selfishness tucked away neatly in a hidden corner of our heart?  Will we be able to find a way to have Him AND feed our egos at the same time?

What is it that gets in the way of our accepting this text?  Why are we never able to quite get the gist?  How come we are forever trying to assert ourselves?  When will we learn to step back and let others squabble over the finer morsels?  When will we lose the mindset of the rat-race and seek the attitude Jesus seeks for us?

The problem is bigger than you and I.  The problem is one that the entire human race feels.  It was buried in our nature when we were born.  The instinct has been passed down through the generations.  Inside of each of us is a hungry beast that is called SELF.  It is forever trying to protect itself and get as much as it can.  It is so buried within us that we hardly recognize its greedy tendencies.  But they are there.

The solution is not an easy one.  This little miser SELF lives in our very soul.  Deep in our hearts it reigns supreme.  It started showing its presence the first time we grabbed at a toy as babies.  It learned and gained strength as we grew up and educated ourselves.  Now it is a formidable adversary and very easily enticed and enhanced by the world we live in and all evil forces.  The only power we can ever have over what rules our being, is Jesus.  Our Savior provides us with a solution.  He brings healing.  It means a cross and it means a death.  BUT SELF MUST DIE.

All our answers are in Jesus.  We need His Light just to see that we are sick.  We need Him to make even the first step towards restoration. We need His strength to achieve it all.  It will be to His glory.  He is our Way.  Only He can correct that what is wrong with us.  Only He can show us how to be the last.

Dear Jesus, create within us an attitude of a servant.  Nail to the cross the tendencies of SELF.  If we would be first let it be the first in humility, sacrifice and love.  Place Your nature within us.  In our world let us be the last.  Help us to seek You before all things.  You in us will be for us like being the first.

Amen